What is Dating Abuse?
Dating abuse is the emotional, psychological, verbal, sexual and physical abuse by a boyfriend or girlfriend. As with domestic violence, dating abuse is about power and control over the victim. It affects people of every race, religion, education, age, sexual orientation and socioeconomic level.

Warning Signs
The warning signs for dating abuse among a younger population are similar to those for domestic violence. The dynamics can be slightly different and more difficult as young adults and teens generally do not have experience with dating relationships, want independence from their parents and may romanticize abusive behavior and confuse it with love. Warning signs include:

• Constant Communication
  The boyfriend (or girlfriend) constantly calls and text messages and must be called back immediately. He constantly needs to know where your child is and what your child is doing.
• Isolation
  The boyfriend (or girlfriend) gets upset when your child spends time with friends and family, and makes her feel guilty she is not spending more time with him. Your child loses interest in activities she enjoys.

Those who experience dating violence are more likely to participate in binge drinking, fighting and/or smoking, and are at an increased risk of suffering from mental illness. Seave, P., & Lockyer, B. (2004). Teen Dating Violence.Office of the Attorney General and the Crime and Violence Prevention Center, WestEd.

• Jealousy Issues
  The boyfriend (or girlfriend) becomes extremely jealous when your child talks to someone else, or someone else pays attention to her.
• Name Calling and Criticism
  The boyfriend (or girlfriend) calls your child names and criticizes the way she looks, her clothes or hairstyle.
• Violent Behavior
  The boyfriend (or girlfriend) has a quick temper. Your child sometimes feels afraid and unsafe around him.
• Emotional Changes
  The boyfriend (or girlfriend) treats your child in a way that makes her feel sad, lonely and desperate. Your child might be upset all the time, lash out at others and cry a lot.
• Making Excuses
  Your child makes excuses and apologizes for the behavior of her boyfriend (or girlfriend).
• Physical Signs
  You notice bruises, scratches and other injuries that cannot quickly and easily be explained, or the explanation does not make sense.

Resources for Victims of Dating Abuse

If you have a child or friend who is in an abusive dating relationship, the organizations listed below will have information and resources to help.

For Immediate Assistance

National Teen Dating Abuse Helpline
The opportunity to speak one-on-one with a trained Peer Advocate who can offer support and connect you to resources 24 hours a day, seven days a week.
1-866-331-9474 or
1-866-331-8453 (TTY)
website: www.loveisrespect.org

For Further Information on Dating Abuse

Break the Cycle
This Website engages, educates and empowers youth to build lives and communities free from domestic and dating violence.
website: www.breakthecycle.org

Choose Respect
Choose Respect is an initiative to help adolescents, ages 11 to 14, form healthy relationships to prevent dating abuse before it starts. This national effort is designed to motivate adolescents to challenge harmful beliefs about dating abuse and take steps to form respectful relationships.
website: www.chooserespect.org

National Youth Violence Prevention Resource Center
This Website contains fact sheets on a broad range of violence topics that affect teens. Each fact sheet has an introduction, what you can do, helpful links and resources.
website: www.safeyouth.org

Teen Action Campaign
Developed by the Family Violence Prevention Fund, this Website explains how to help a friend who is experiencing or committing intimate partner violence. It includes specific tips for victims and abusers.
website: www.seeitandstopit.org